


Bad at love (What’s my hand without your heart to hold?)

by BookwormRina



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alpha Kim Dongyoung | Doyoung, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Angst with a Happy Ending, Beta Jung Yoonoh | Jaehyun, Drinking, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Omega Jung Yoonoh | Jaehyun, Smut, Swearing, everyone needs a friend like johnny, friends!johnjae, mentioned!norenmin, side!taeten
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-25
Updated: 2019-07-25
Packaged: 2020-07-08 02:07:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,617
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19861762
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BookwormRina/pseuds/BookwormRina
Summary: Jaehyun had been happy with just loving Doyoung from afar. But now that they are bound together, instead of the fairy tale Jaehyun had been dreaming of, everything seems to fall apart.------“Jaehyun.”He stilled when he heard Doyoung’s voice behind him. He sounded miserable, and the omega in Jaehyun wanted nothing more than embrace his alpha and soothe his pain and make Doyoung smile at him again. Jaehyun knew it couldn’t happen. He couldn’t give in to Doyoung and allow him to walk all over him again and again.“Where are you going?”“Why do you care?” Jaehyun saw Doyoung wince. He sighed. “I’m going to the radio. I’ll be back around midnight. Not that you’d worry.” He opened the door to leave as soon as possible.





	Bad at love (What’s my hand without your heart to hold?)

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt: N-831  
> Hello!
> 
> Thank you for clicking on my fic! Before reading, I'd like to warn you about a few things:  
> \- this fic deals with some heavy themes, such as depression and isolation  
> \- there is drunken sex  
> \- and there is a slight mention of harassment and bullying  
> \- also there are a few motifs that could be understood as mentions of transphobia. This wasn't my intention, but you know: after something is written, everyone has their own interpretation.  
> \- these themes are the exact reason for the happy ending tag: our world is cruel, why should we make ourself suffer even more?
> 
> Read with caution!
> 
> (Title taken from Demi Lovato's Tell me you love me)

**Act II Part 1**

Jaehyun had a shit day. Or rather, a shit week, really.

He had been running around all day to get every necessary document updated. He had waited at the doctors for his certification, waited at the document office, and now waited at the school administration office, getting more and more agitated with the bureaucracy. 

And the hypocrisy of the people. They were all smiley and helpful – until they found out why he came for. Of course, he’s not the first omega to move in with their alpha. But he also had to register his new status as an omega, and people started to be… judgmental when they heard that, to say the least.

To say he was angry with it would be an understatement. No one was rude to him until they found out his status and some even outright ignored him, calling alphas and betas that arrived later than him, before him. And he was the one who came to an appointment.

It was well in the afternoon when he finally finished but the snarling and the rudeness of the beta woman at the administration office still ringing in his ears.

_Maybe if he learned how to keep his legs closed…_

The worst part was that those words hit too close. Maybe if he kept his legs closed… he wouldn’t be in this situation. He wouldn’t have to go through the humiliation of changing his status, to endure the judging glances, to be this alone.

He arrived at his new apartment with tears in his eyes. Unlike the room he shared with Sicheng before, this one was off-campus. Not that the long bus ride helped him get any better, his thoughts were still messy form the anger and the helplessness.

He never realized how many people howl at omegas.

It’s not that he wasn’t attractive before, he knew he was. But now his body was changing, and more people – mostly alphas – turned after him, catcalling and ogling. He hated it.

He opened the front door, punching in the correct combination. The lights were on in the kitchen, and Jaehyun faintly heard noises of the television from the living room, so he supposed Doyoung was already home – which wasn’t surprising, considering it was dark outside.

He also heard small chattering from the kitchen, so he left that way.

And there he stood. Doyoung. He was making a sandwich, his back facing the door. And Jaehyun knew it wasn’t a good sign when his heart started beating faster in hope, just by seeing him. He already felt the incoming heartbreak.

“Hey,” he said quietly. He watched as Doyoung’s back tensed, his whole demeanor freezing up. _There it was._

Doyoung picked up his sandwich, and left for the living room, without sparing a glance to Jaehyun. Jaehyun leaned against the wall and slowly slid down.

He was desperate to be on good terms with Doyoung, but he couldn’t even get a hello back. He wanted to talk to someone, to hear a few nice words, to be not despised just for a little bit.

He hated to be this alone.

**Act I**

Doyoung had a shit day, Jaehyun knew that as soon as he picked up the phone. Doyoung only ever called him “Jaehyunie” when he was either drunk or wanted something from Jaehyun. Possibly to get drunk.

“Are you okay, hyung?” He asked, concerned. Jaehyun didn’t like it when Doyoung had a shit day, he wanted the alpha to smile, and if something managed to ruin Doyoung’s day, he rarely ever smiled. On those days, Jaehyun missed his smiles more than anything.

Also, on those days, Doyoung always sought comfort in Jaehyun’s company, and that fact made Jaehyun’s heart beat unnecessarily much.

“No, I’m not. My headass professor said that the reasoning in my essay was completely wrong and that I didn’t understand the topic he gave us, but he’s just an uptight asshole who doesn’t consider other people’s opinion valid, even if it has been supported by multiple theorists that he even uses as examples if it doesn’t match with his own.”

“Please, tell me, you didn’t tell him so…”

“Yeah, so, I might fail his class, I don’t think he likes me.”

“Hyung…”

“Anyways, what do you say to some soju and chocolate ice cream?”

“That it’s a disgusting combo.”

“You weren’t complaining three weeks ago. Please, Jaehyunie?”

Jaehyun sighed. “Okay. Are you coming over to the beta dorms, or?”

“Actually, I’m downstairs. I’m coming up in a bit.”

“I’ll open the door, then.”

Jaehyun ended the call and left his door slightly ajar so Doyoung can come in later. Sicheng wasn’t home, but leaving the door was never a problem within the beta dormitories. He went to his room to dress into something that wasn’t his old grey sweatpants, the ones he knew Doyoung despised very much. He chose a pair of black jeans, with his favorite pink hoodie that he wouldn’t trade for the world. Not even for Doyoung’s love.

Okay, that might have been a lie.

As he pulled down the hem of his hoodie, he felt a pair of strong arms around his torso, the clean, comforting scent of the alpha enwrapping him. When he was whiney, Doyoung definitely became clingy as well, forgetting every sense of propriety, as he gently laid his head on Jaehyun’s shoulders. Jaehyun shivered from the sudden closeness, and the yearning for the other’s attention bubbled up in him again.

“This bad?” he asked, praying that his voice wouldn’t betray his vulnerability.

Doyoung hummed. He had his eyes closed as if he was savoring the moment. Jaehyun wished he could let go that easily as well.

“I know I said I want to go out, but can we stay in for a bit more? Like this?” Doyoung all but breathed out the words, his breath tickling Jaehyun’s neck. “Just you and me, against the world.”

Jaehyun gulped. Technically, alphas were allowed in the beta dorms, but the rumors that followed were often insidious. But then again, when was the last time he was able to say no to Doyoung?

When they reached the bar, only a few people were lingering at the tables, and a group of office workers huddled together singing an old pop song. Doyoung and Jaehyun quickly looked for a table hidden from most of the other customers. As Doyoung looked through the menu (“We should order some chicken too, what do you think?”), Jaehyun had some time to regard him.

Doyoung seemed deep bone tired. His skin that got paler in the past few days Jaehyun didn’t see him only seemed to accent the dark circles below his eyes. His slightly trembling fingers beat an impatient rhythm on the table as he was reading, and the tenseness in his shoulders made Jaehyun’s heart ache.

He reached over the table to put his hand on Doyoung’s. “Hyung,” he breathed. “Tell me what’s wrong. I know you’re upset because of your professor, but… You don’t seem just upset. There’s something more. Please, please… Tell me.” He caressed Doyoung’s fingers gently, to remind him that he can lean on Jaehyun. He will always be beside him.

And Doyoung had let him, for a while. Then he placed his hand above Jaehyun’s, softly holding him down.

“It’s nothing you should worry about, Jaehyunie. There are just some things piling up, and what happened with that asshole was just the last drop. And my rut being near doesn’t help. But you know me, I will be fine.” He looked at Jaehyun with a somewhat reassuring smile. “Thank you for coming out with me, though. It helps to distract me.” Doyoung gave Jaehyun’s hand a few pats before retracting.

Jaehyun frowned. He knew Doyoung didn’t tell him the full truth, but it didn’t seem like he could pull out of him any more about the topic, so he decided for a change.

“I managed to get in the radio club,” he smiled at Doyoung. “One of my classmates on media, Johnny, told me that someone dropped out and that he could recommend me if I wanted.”

“Jaehyun, that’s fantastic!” There it was. Doyoung’s smile, his real smile. Jaehyun felt his insides turn mushy just by the sight of it. “I know you wanted to get in so badly, and when you missed the application period, I remember you were moping around. I felt so bad like it was my fault.”

“It wasn’t!” Jaehyun was quick to deny. “Maybe Ten’s. Or the basketball tryout’s. But not yours.”

That made Doyoung laugh. “Well, I was there with Ten, wasn’t I? You know how important omega rights are for him and Taeyong. And Yuta, because, you know, he hates everything and everyone that at least hints at not accepting something. Anyways, I am very proud of you.”

Jaehyun felt the tips of his ears redden, and he was thankful for the dimly lit place. “It’s not that big deal,” he muttered. “It’s just intern work, basically, like… bringing water to the hosts and stuff, but…” he looked into Doyoung’s eyes with a shy smile, “thank you. It means a lot to me.”

Doyoung smiled back and rang for the waitress.

*

Doyoung honest to God _giggled_ as he pulled Jaehyun closer by his neck. The two were more than a little intoxicated, the chicken they ended up ordering doing little to compensate for the bottles and bottles of soju they drank.

They have left the bar in favor of getting some ice cream from the Seven-Eleven nearby, and they were currently side-by-side, hugging each other, and Jaehyun’s beta was _purring_ with delight from Doyoung’s closeness – not so much when Doyoung let him go to choose their ice cream instead. He has seen the cashier, another beta based on the scent lingering in the store, glancing at them knowingly, especially when Doyoung basically fell on Jaehyun with a hug.

“Jaehyunie! I chose peach ice cream for you! Because you’re soft and sweet like a peach. You even smell like one.” He pulled Jaehyun closer by his hips. “My sweet peach,” he giggled again.

Jaehyun felt his beta rejoicing with every caress of Doyoung, the fluttering burn of his touch lingering on Jaehyun’s skin. He felt alive. _His beta felt reckless._

“Ooooh~ Jaehyunie, look!” Doyoung sing-sang, as he strode to one of the fridges. “They have flavored soju!”

*

This was probably a bad idea, and Jaehyun knew it deep down. But Doyoung was kissing him as if his life depended on it, so Jaehyun couldn’t care about anything else, but Doyoung’s lips that tasted like the blueberry soju they bought at the convenience store after they finished their ice cream and his hands that caressed the soft skin under his hoodie.

Jaehyun let themselves in his apartment. He managed to do that without detaching from Doyoung, who pushed them in, and gently turned themselves until Jaehyun’s back was against the door. They parted for a few seconds, enough for Jaehyun to take in the picture of Doyoung in front of him: his cheeks reddened from the alcohol, his lips slightly swollen from their kissing, and even though his eyes were clouded, there was one thing evident in them: want.

Doyoung wanted Jaehyun, and Jaehyun never felt so desired in his entire life. He leaned in again, close to Doyoung, close enough for their lips to nearly touch. He felt it on his lips when Doyoung ran his tongue over his lips, just a second before they reconnected. Their kiss was sloppy, wet, and blissful, and Jaehyun would happily drown in Doyoung – his scent, his kiss, his embrace. It was almost too good to be true.

“Let’s get to the bed,” Doyoung rasped against Jaehyun’s lips as he kicked down his shoes. Jaehyun did the same, relishing in the feeling as Doyoung slid his hands from his hips to his back, roaming around a bit, before grabbing his ass, and pulling Jaehyun impossibly closer.

Jaehyun threw his head back with a moan, his hips hurling forward, grinding against Doyoung, who started peppering sinful kisses against Jaehyun’s throat. They somehow managed to stumble to the bed, the initial gentleness of Doyoung disappearing completely. Doyoung’s scent screamed alpha, demanding submission, and he looked at Jaehyun as if he wanted to take him apart to small pieces. Jaehyun knew that he would let him, his own beta squirming in pleasure from the attention.

Doyoung pushed Jaehyun to the bed. “Strip,” he commanded as he started unbuttoning his own shirt. Jaehyun was quick to obey, undressing as fast as he could without his eyes leaving Doyoung. The alpha left on his unbuttoned shirt, and reached for his belt, that he unbuckled with an unfaltering move. Jaehyun pulled to his knees and settled down on the edge of the bed. He kissed the navel of Doyoung, then worked his way down. Doyoung caressed Jaehyun’s cheek, only to run his fingers through his hair and grasp it fiercely. He guided Jaehyun to his crotch.

“Be a good boy, Jaehyunie, and suck me, will ya?”

Jaehyun’s whole body trembled when he heard the nickname. Doyoung’s voice was different now – not that high, melodious, a little bit annoyed sound made its way to Jaehyun’s ears, this one was a deep growl, rich and animalistic that made him shiver with anticipation. It was an alpha’s voice. Jaehyun’s thoughts became hazy, and there was a certain warmness inside him.

He freed Doyoung from his pants using his teeth, making sure that he wasn’t hurting the other, pressing kisses here and there. When he was done, he finally could look at Doyoung. He felt his mouth water, and he had to bite back a moan when he saw Doyoung already fully erected, in front of his face.

“Suck,” Doyoung grunted again. Jaehyun licked his lips once before allowing Doyoung to pull his head closer, his hands never leaving Jaehyun’s hair. Jaehyun opened his mouth, and heat surrounded Doyoung’s cock soon after.

Doyoung inhaled sharply at the sudden sensation, moaning out load when Jaehyun applied a little pressure with his tongue. Jaehyun bobbed his head a few times, keeping eye contact with Doyoung above him. When the cock in his mouth felt more comfortable, he took it in his mouth as far as he could, grabbing the base with his hand and swallowed around Doyoung’s cock.

“Fuck,” Doyoung breathed out, his eyes burning Jaehyun, “you’re so fucking pretty, Jaehyunie.”

Jaehyun felt the heat in the pit of his stomach again. He ached for Doyoung to praise him again, to call him pet names, to touch him, so, so badly. He whined at Doyoung; he needed the attention.

Doyoung cupped Jaehyun’s cheek and combed his fingers through his hair. “Pretty Jaehyunie,” he held his head. “I will fuck your mouth, okay?”

Jaehyun gave an agreeing hum before Doyoung pulled back a bit and pushed his dick into Jaehyun’s mouth. Jaehyun tried to keep his jaw loose enough for Doyoung to move comfortably. Jaehyun felt the other’s cock hit the back of his throat several times, and that made his knees tremble.

“Relax your throat,” Doyoung instructed again, Jaehyun eager to follow his orders. “You’re doing so well, Jaehyunie,” he moaned out. The praise made him moan again around Doyoung’s cock, the heat in his belly starting to expand. Jaehyun never felt so warm from the inside. His beta was going crazy.

After a few more thrusts, Doyoung pulled out. He held Jaehyun’s chin and tilted his head up.

“You should see yourself, Jaehyun. You’re so pretty like this, with your lips reddened, and saliva smashed around your mouth.” He leaned down and pressed a small kiss on Jaehyun’s forehead. “Lie on your back, baby.”

Jaehyun scrambled to do what Doyoung asked. He watched desperately as Doyoung shook off his last pieces of clothing and mounted over Jaehyun. “So, so pretty,” he mumbled, taking in Jaehyun’s figure sprawled out on the bed. “Do you have any lube?”

Jaehyun nodded feverishly. “It’s in the bottom drawer,” he rasped out. He saw Doyoung’s eyes flash towards him, full of something dark, carnal and hungry, and the air got thicker with alpha pheromones. “How fitting,” Doyoung remarked. He quickly went and grabbed the lube and helped to prop Jaehyun up. He opened the bottle and squeezed a generous amount on his fingers. “Are you ready, my pretty baby?” he asked. Jaehyun nodded, struggling to keep his eyes open. He watched as Doyoung looked him up and down, licking his lips in lust as he took in the vulnerable, open and wrecked state Jaehyun was already in.

He reached down to Jaehyun’s hole, tracing the rim gently a few times until it was fluttering against his fingertips. “So, so pretty. You are so fucking pretty, Jaehyunie, and all for me.” He pushed in a finger, excruciatingly slowly. “I’m going to fuck you so good.”

“Hyung,” Jaehyun moaned out. He felt overwhelmed, all the attention and praise Doyoung gave him – this was more than he ever wanted. The beta inside him was in a frenzy like it wanted to crawl out, making Jaehyun all hot and sensitive. “Hyung, please…”

“Please what, my pretty baby?”

Jaehyun whined. “Please more.”

Jaehyun in his dazed state half-expected Doyoung to tease him more, to make him wait, but Doyoung complied, sliding his finger out, and almost immediately pushing two back.

“Like that, baby?”

Jaehyun nodded frantically, moving his hips against Doyoung’s fingers. He forced himself to open his eyes and look at Doyoung. “An… and you?”

He watched as Doyoung smirked, eyes still hooded with alcohol and lust. “Me too. Me too, my pretty Jaehyunie.”

Jaehyun felt a sob come out as Doyoung added a third finger and fastened his pace. Jaehyun felt slicker, wetness dripping from his hole as Doyoung fucked him open with his fingers. Jaehyun felt like he would die if Doyoung didn’t fuck him.

When Doyoung deemed him loose enough, he pulled out his fingers and readjusted Jaehyun’s position, so his legs were against his chest. Jaehyun let out a whine as Doyoung dragged his dick against Jaehyun’s ass, drawing delicate patterns on his skin, teasing him.

“You’re so sexy, fuck,” Doyoung groaned when Jaehyun spread up his legs further. “I want to leave covered in my fingerprints for days. I want to fuck you so good, that you would feel my dick in your ass every time you move a muscle for a whole week, Jaehyun. My pretty, sexy baby,” he leaned down and pressed a kiss on Jaehyun’s chest.

“Please, hyung, please, please, _please_! Fuck me already, please!”

Doyoung said nothing, just pressed down another kiss and entered Jaehyun. Jaehyun moaned loudly at the sensation, and with the closeness, he felt the whole body of Doyoung shivering with want. His eyes burned with desire as he held Jaehyun’s gaze, and he started ramming inside him.

Jaehyun held into whatever he could, his own legs, Doyoung’s biceps, Doyoung’s legs, the sheets, but nothing seemed enough. He couldn’t get enough of Doyoung on him, Doyoung inside him, using him, filling him up like it was meant to be. He kept praising Jaehyun how good he was, how pretty he was, how well he was taking Doyoung’s dick. The beta inside Jaehyun burned up.

Doyoung stopped a bit, pulled out to change Jaehyun’s position again. He raised Jaehyun’s hip a bit more and put his legs on his shoulders to get deeper access. He kissed Jaehyun again, a sloppy kiss with too much teeth and too much saliva, but Jaehyun gave in happily.

Doyoung stayed close as he re-entered Jaehyun’s waiting hole. Jaehyun whimpered when he could already feel the tell-tale signs of Doyoung’s knot.

“My pretty Jaehyunie… I’m going to fuck you so good.” He rasped into Jaehyun’s neck. “You’re so fucking gorgeous.” He picked up his pace, and Jaehyun sobbed Doyoung’s name over and over again as a sinful prayer. They chased their orgasms, Jaehyun giving himself completely to Doyoung, and Doyoung taking everything eagerly.

“Doyoung… hyung, I’m close,” Jaehyun panted. Doyoung reached between them, pressing their foreheads together, caressing Jaehyun’s skin a bit before taking his cock inside his hand and stroking him into completion. The orgasm hit Jaehyun with trails of fire, its heat pulsing through his veins, in harmony with how Doyoung’s knot pulsed within him. After a few thrusts Doyoung came with a low moan that sounded so sweet to Jaehyun, he felt like he could listen to it forever. Looking at Doyoung above him forever. 

“You sweet little thing, you’re gonna be mine,” Doyoung growled into Jaehyun’s ears, and the words didn’t immediately register in the boy’s mind still hazed with the sweet fulfillment, but then Jaehyun felt a sharp pain in his neck as Doyoung bit him eagerly. Jaehyun’s eyes fluttered as he mewled out Doyoung’s name again.

The heat in his belly started to subdue, the knot of the alpha inside him keeping them close, and Doyoung’s mouth was still on his neck when it occurred Jaehyun that something was different now.

He locked on Doyoung.

He locked on Doyoung, which should be impossible since he wasn’t an omega. He lowered his shaking legs, the strain in them being more and more prominent by the seconds. But the feeling inside him didn’t disappear.

His eyes widened in panic, as Doyoung carefully slipped out, Jaehyun scurried to sit up. His breath heaved, he felt tears threatening to come out. He heard Doyoung sniff the air still stuffy with their scents. He held his gaze, feeling full of terror as he watched realization draw upon Doyoung, who seemed more and more confused and irritated as the seconds passed by.

“What the fuck?”

**Act II Part 2**

It’s not that Jaehyun liked high school that much, but he wished he could go back. It was simpler, and he had friends. _Like Doyoung_ , his brain helpfully supplied. The air in his throat would be probably stuck at the thought as if he wasn’t already drained from his emotions.

There was still 20 minutes for his Introduction to Philosophy class to start. He had taken it up, because it had been compulsory, but also because his friends did. _Back when they considered him a friend._ There were only a few students scattered around the auditorium when Jaehyun entered the room. He always arrived early to reserve a few seats for the others, so he almost left automatically for the area they usually sat, but a judging glace from one of the upperclassmen nearby – and the curse word she growled at Jaehyun – was like a warning shot on why he shouldn’t do that.

After _what happened_ – and as much as Jaehyun wished it didn’t happen, it did – no one looked at Jaehyun the same. Where he had classes with people who didn’t care much about him – except maybe a few girls who had a small crush on the handsome beta, or some alphas and betas interested in the basketball team he played at – now he only saw lustful alphas looking at him, or a few of the braver betas catcalling after him. The girls that previously crushed on him turned away in shame.

_The people he used to call friends looked at him with disgust._

Probably that was the worst of all. Watching Ten and Taeyong enter the auditorium happily, holding hands, and watching the smiles turn into scowls as soon as they laid their eyes on him. Hearing the obnoxious laughter of Yuta from miles away that abruptly stops the moment he spots Jaehyun and sneers at him instead. Seeing Sicheng barely sparing him a pitiful glance as he followed Yuta.

Doyoung completely ignoring his existence as he walked to their – _his_ – friends.

Nothing really registered to Jaehyun during the class as the crying that was suffocating him for a few days now hit him with an enormous force. He wanted nothing more than going _home_ , bury himself under innumerable blankets and just disappear from the world.

_Maybe forever_ …

But home wasn’t a comforting place anymore, not with Doyoung looking right through him, so he decided that he should maybe avoid that as long as he can. When the professor finished the class, Jaehyun but sprinted out of the classroom so he won’t have to meet anyone. He was tired of the curse words directed at him.

His first thought was the library, but one glance through the window was enough for him to know that he won’t be able to hide there. He slid down against the wall. He closed his eyes, trying to hold back the tears.

He wanted to go back so much.

Even his blatantly ignored pining after Doyoung was better than this. Back then, at least he didn’t ignore his existence. They were friends. They often explored the surroundings of the university, looking for small, unique places, and they spent hours talking. Well, mostly Doyoung was talking, and Jaehyun listened, smiling. He loved listening to Doyoung’s voice, especially when he was happy. And Jaehyun would have done everything to make him happy.

That was his first mistake, he supposed.

He decided a coffee would be somewhat nice though, so he went to one of the little cafés he and Doyoung used to frequent. The barista smiled at him when he saw him, and Jaehyun almost hoped – up until he got close enough and the barista got a sniff of him and his face distorted to confusion. Before the barista could say anything, he ordered to take away and stood aside, far away from everyone.

That didn’t stop everyone to go closer to him. He felt the gaze a group of betas sitting at one of the tables, he felt glances from the barista as he was preparing Jaehyun’s coffee. He also saw a few alphas that were in the queue after him slowly creeping closer to him. When his name was called, he tried to get away as quickly as possible, but he still felt a hand feeling his behind up.

Humiliation rushed through Jaehyun’s body. He felt embarrassed, and the alpha who touched him just grinned at him as he stepped closer.

“What is a pretty little thing like you doing alone?” he purred. Jaehyun stepped backward, but the alpha kept creeping closer.

The barista shouted Jaehyun’s name, and the omega dashed past the alpha so he could get his coffee and out of the situation. The alpha had different plans.

“So, Jaehyun, huh? That’s your name, right?” the alpha followed Jaehyun closely. “Pretty name for the pretty omega.” Jaehyun would have been flattered had the alpha not scare him with his hungry grin. But like this, he felt defenseless and threatened. He quickly grabbed the cup with his name in hopes of finally escaping, but the rude alpha followed him regardless.

Jaehyun felt like crying.

“Hey,” the barista that eyed Jaehyun called out. “Leave him alone, asshole. He has an alpha already.”

The alpha snarled back. “If he has one, why doesn’t he smell like it?” He came closer again, his hips pressing into Jaehyun’s back, his nose in his neck - only for a second though. Jaehyun could sense the exact moment that the alpha smelled Doyoung on him, because he stepped back immediately, eyes confused.

Everyone was looking at them Jaehyun never felt more humiliated in his life.

“That’s right, fucker,” the barista shouted at the alpha. “Now leave before I call the cops.” He glanced at Jaehyun, concerned. “You okay, bro?”

Jaehyun nodded timidly, whispered a meek thanks, and fled the scene.

The prickling in his eyes had reduced by the time he reached home. And for the first time he moved in with Doyoung, he didn’t try to initiate some type of communication with his mate, he just rushed to his room and collapsed on the bed.

But he couldn’t escape Doyoung regardless. “Did you bring eggs?”

Jaehyun turned his head to see the other look at his nails, clearly waiting for an answer. The urge to cry came back.

“I was supposed to?”

“I sent you a text.”

Jaehyun suppressed the need to say something offensive and just shrugged. He figured it wouldn’t do any good to fight Doyoung today. “I didn’t check my phone.” He sucked on his teeth a bit before he continued. “I thought you blocked my number anyways.”

Doyoung scoffed. “I can’t believe you’re such a useless omega.”

Jaehyun rose up to look at the other properly. “I’m your _mate_ , not your _slave_ , Doyoung.” He breathed out to banish the quiver from his voice. “There’s a difference, you know.”

Doyoung’s eyes squinted dangerously. “You have the audacity to come home reeking from some other alpha and act like I’m the bad guy?” He scoffed. “Don’t you dare to blame me for your mistakes, it was you who couldn’t keep it in your pants!”

Jaehyun felt like he was slapped. “What?”

“You lied to me about your status, seduced me to mate you, but I never cheated on you! Never even thought about it! And then you show up, in our apartment, with some other fucker’s smell all over you and _you_ accuse me of treating you bad?!” Doyoung walked closer to the bed. “Unbelievable. You’re unbelievable.”

Jaehyun sniffed, did everything in his power to not break down. Not in front of Doyoung. “You sound just like an alpha. I hope you’re proud.” He shifted closer to took straight into Doyoung’s eyes. “Because I’m an omega means I’m living for alphas to mount on me in public, right? I shouldn’t be thankful for the barista threatening to call the cops on the alpha that harassed me, because now I’m an omega and I surely asked for it, right?” He couldn’t stop the tears now. He saw the shock in Doyoung’s eyes. He hated how he thought he looked like an adorable bunny.

"And I didn’t lie to you! I didn’t seduce you! It was all you! You were the one who came to me. You were the one who wanted to drink so much. You started it. You knew how much I love you, how much I have always loved you, and you always took advantage of that. And I’m a fool because despite everything I _still_ love you.” Jaehyun’s voice wavered, so he took a deep breath before continuing. “You know, I never thought that you would ever love me as your mate. It didn’t even cross my mind. But I thought that our years of friendship meant at least so much that you don’t start denying my whole existence. That you don’t look through me like I was thin air. Because I don’t know what’s happening to me, I don’t know why I’m suddenly an omega, and I don’t know what to do! And I’m so alone. You’re telling your truth to everyone willing to listen and their mothers, but it’s not you whose body changed from one moment to the next, it’s not you who gets harassed in public while everyone looks away and it’s not you who gets all the dirty stares for simply being an omega. You’re supposed to be beside me and help, but you always hurt me more than the whole world.”

He stopped to catch his breath and wipe his tears. It occurred to him that he never raised his voice to Doyoung before.

“I thought I didn’t ask for too much. Just a minimal support.” He sniffled again, a bitter laugh tearing its way out. “But I guess it _is_ too much after all.”

Jaehyun got up with shaky legs. He was fatigued, but he couldn’t stay at the same place as Doyoung. Not now. His mate was looking at him for the first time in weeks, face white and pale as the moonlight, eyes full of emotions Jaehyun was too exhausted to try to decipher. He slipped away from Doyoung, pulling his shoes back on.

“Jaehyun.”

He stilled when he heard Doyoung’s voice behind him. He sounded miserable, and the omega in Jaehyun wanted nothing more than embrace his alpha and soothe his pain and make Doyoung smile at him again. Jaehyun knew it couldn’t happen. He couldn’t give in to Doyoung and allow him to walk all over him again and again.

“Where are you going?”

“Why do you care?” Jaehyun saw Doyoung wince. He sighed. “I’m going to the radio. I’ll be back around midnight. Not that you’d worry.” He opened the door to leave as soon as possible.

“No, wait…”

But Jaehyun didn’t hear the rest after he slammed the door to Doyoung’s face. He didn’t want to hear it anyways.

*

Jaehyun wished he could say he felt better when he reached the building of the radio like he usually did, but that would have been a big fat lie.

He cherished the radio club, even if he got in less than a month ago. He had always wanted to test himself on that field, but now it was more than a slight interest – it was his safe space. After he changed to an omega, the basketball club promptly kicked him out – he never noticed there was a law that omegas can’t be part of any sports clubs, but apparently, there was. His previous gym canceled his membership as well.

But the radio club allowed him to stay, and Jaehyun was fairly sure it was because of Johnny – his classmate who recommended him in the first place. Johnny was the host of the night show, he was funny and caring, and an alpha – probably the nicest one Jaehyun ever met. Johnny did so much for him already, Jaehyun didn’t want to burden him any further – so he left straight to the omega bathroom, hoping no one would see that his face is still red from crying, and his clothes are red like a strawberry slushie.

He should’ve known better.

“Jaehyun?” The omega could tell that it was Johnny knocking on the other side of the door just by his voice – but after a few seconds, the distinctive scent of burnt wood reached his nose. “Are you there?”

It took a few seconds until Jaehyun could answer without his voice betraying him. “Yeah, I’m here.”

“Are… are you okay?” Johnny sounded distressed. “Should I come in?”

The question made Jaehyun freeze. Johnny was the only person in the whole university that still treated him like a human being, and he’d probably need all the comfort he could get before his mental state goes absolutely defective, he knew that. But he also knew that he just got out of a fight with his mate about being too close to another alpha- then again, Doyoung could go and fuck himself.

Jaehyun opened the door for Johnny, and he found himself engulfed in a bear hug immediately, Johnny’s alpha scent calming him down.

“What happened?” Johnny asked.

Jaehyun wriggled out of the hug, looking at himself in the bathroom mirror. He looked ridiculous. “I just… I had an… an unfortunate encounter with a slushie.” He forced a giggle out. “No biggie.” He should have known lying to Johnny wasn’t going to be that easy when he saw the older suspiciously narrow his eyes.

“So, you’re telling me that you accidentally spilled slushie on yourself?”

Jaehyun nodded weakly.

“Without any outsider violence playing a part in the act?”

Jaehyun ducked his head. “Yeah, no… it may have been thrown at me. By one of my friends. Or rather, someone I thought used to be my friend. It… it’s not important anyway.” He smiled at Johnny bitterly. “I was on my way here, and… I don’t know, Yuta just threw his slushie at me. You know, that was just the icing on the cake today… I had a fight with Doyoung, who’s my mate, or rather, who’s s _upposed_ to be my mate, and…” he felt tears prickling his eyes again.

_God, has he not cried enough?_ He wanted to stop and save whatever small dignity he still had in Johnny’s eyes, but the alpha’s soothing scent, his comforting hand on the small of his back and his understanding gaze, Jaehyun couldn’t find a way to stop himself from spilling everything.

“Like… two and a half weeks ago, I made a stupid, drunken mistake, you know. I had sex with my best friend, on who, by the way, I was crushing since I was like fifteen and entered the school choir in high school. And, he’s an alpha, and I’m a beta. Or rather, I was a beta, and now we’re mated, and I’m an omega, and I don’t know how, or why it happened, but it did.”

Johnny hummed. “I noticed there was a change in your scent. I didn’t want to point out, but… yeah.” He paused, and Jaehyun could envision the inner battle as Johnny tried to come up with appropriate words. “You look different, too. You’re breathtakingly beautiful. Like, probably the prettiest omega I have ever seen.”

Jaehyun closed his eyes. “What’s the point of being the prettiest omega if everyone I loved had turned away from me?” He felt Johnny’s gaze on him, so he opened his eyes again. He tried to smile, but even he felt that it was off. Johnny’s contemplative look didn’t change, albeit he furrowed his brows a little.

“Everyone has turned away from you?” he asked in a quiet voice.

Jaehyun had to look away. “I feel so. Not everyone, per se – my little brother had a really passionate speech addressed to my parents when I told things at home. About how I still am their son and how my secondary gender shouldn’t affect their love for me.” This time, Jaehyun’s smile was earnest, just like every time he thought about Jaemin. “He’s the best. And one of his mates is Doyoung’s younger brother, and he called Doyoung a jerk face to face. And their mate made me a spicy hot pot to cheer me up when I went home. And I have you too,” he added a bit shyly.

That made Johnny smile. “That’s right,” he booped Jaehyun on the nose. “You have me, Jae.”

They giggled. Johnny’s arm found its way around Jaehyun’s waist, holding him closer to Johnny. He sent Jaehyun another comforting smile before asking. “What happened with your mate?”

There was a pause before Jaehyun started talking again. “He thinks I hid that I was an omega from the beginning, and I lied about it just to have him have sex with me so I can bind him to me. And he tells everyone so. Which is…” Jaehyun took a shaky breath, “Ridiculous. It was him who bit me, he’s the alpha. But people rather believe to a rational alpha than to an emotional little omega like me, don’t they?” He rubbed his eyes. Exhaustion caught up to him again. “I used to be able to protect myself, you know? When I was a beta. But now I can’t even do that, and it seems that I’m the one to be blamed for. It’s… frustrating.” Jaehyun leaned his head to Johnny’s chest, who started to play with his hair immediately.

“I’m so sorry that you have to suffer like this,” he murmured. “I wish I could help you.”

Jaehyun hummed. “You’re helping. You’re listening to me, and you helped me get into the radio club. You’re helping so much; you can’t even imagine.” He got up to look at Johnny. “It might sound weird, but… you’re keeping me sane.”

Johnny smiled. “In that case, I’m really glad to be your friend.” He held Jaehyun’s hand, squeezing it. “And if we’re already talking about the radio… there is something I’d like to ask from you.” To Jaehyun’s questioning gaze, Johnny nodded and took a deep breath. “I know that this is like incredibly late notice, but Sehun, my co-host left the club, and I was thinking… if you would like to jump in instead of him?”

“Me?” Jaehyun’s eyes rounded. “But why me? I’m just a rookie here.”

“You also have the nicest speaking voice. Look, I know it’s a lot to ask in such a short time, but I honestly think you can do it. You’ll have the script and everything, and I will help you, I promise. I mean, you will also have to come every night now, but…” He worried his lips a bit, before continuing. “Maybe it will help to take your mind off of… things, and-”

“I’ll do it.” Jaehyun surprised even himself. But Johnny was right, in everything, and for a second Jaehyun didn’t feel like everyone was miles away from him, like maybe he could hope again. He needed to try this. “I’d like to try it.”

Johnny gave him a blinding smile, visibly relieved. “Thanks, Jae! You’re the best.”

Jaehyun smiled back, and he didn’t feel like he had to force it. Johnny helped him get up, and after washing his face, Johnny promised him that he could borrow his denim jacket to cover the slushie stain.

What Jaehyun didn’t see coming was Taeyong, nervously biting his lips behind the door when he and Johnny exited.

Jaehyun stopped in his tracks, causing Johnny to slightly bump into him.

“Hi,” Taeyong waved meekly, wobbling his lower lips.

“Hi,” Jaehyun said back, throat dry. He knew Taeyong was invited to the radio, he got a monthly segment as the leader of the Student Association for Omega Rights, they even went out for a drink to celebrate it a few months ago, but with everything going down, it completely slipped Jaehyun’s mind.

“Jaehyun, I…” Taeyong seemed lost for words. “Can we talk? Please?”

Jaehyun looked at Johnny. “I’ll be at the recording booth,” he promised. “We’re on air in half an hour, I’ll meet you guys there.”

With Johnny leaving, an uneasy silence seemed to take over his place. Jaehyun looked at everywhere but the older omega, and he knew that Taeyong was probably examining his shoes – something he usually did when feeling uncomfortable.

“Jaehyun, I…” Taeyong started again, which surprised Jaehyun. He didn’t expect Taeyong to actually talk to him and be nervous. He _hated_ Jaehyun now, after all. “I heard what you and Johnny talked about in the bathroom.

Jaehyun sucked on his teeth, now looking at Taeyong. He was right, the other seemed to glare at his comfy slippers he got from Ten. “… how much did you hear?”

“Pretty much everything,” Taeyong admitted with a sigh. He finally looked up at Jaehyun. “I saw Yuta throw the slushie, and I wanted to apologize in his name. I mean, I was angry at you for pretending to not be an omega and be our friend at the same time, but what Yuta did was too much.” He paused and reached out for Jaehyun’s hand. “It turns out what _we_ did was too much. I’m sorry. It didn’t even cross my mind that you didn’t lie.”

Jaehyun pulled his hand away. “That speaks volumes about what you think of me as a person, Taeyong.”

“No, I… I didn’t mean like that!” He looked at Jaehyun with rounded eyes. “I mean… I heard about betas changing secondary gender before when they found an alpha or an omega they want to tremendously appeal to. It happens, from time to time. But you were always so unfairly beautiful, and we omegas _do_ start glowing after being mated, so I didn’t think much about how your looks changed. And, I guess, I… I didn’t bother to get close enough to you to notice your scent changed too. And I didn’t bother to hear out your side of the story. I’m really sorry about that.” He dropped his head again. “I was a terrible friend, and that’s not something that you can easily forgive me. Or I forgive myself.”

He reached out again, this time he gently cradled Jaehyun’s face. “But I want to be a better friend. I will help you with the omega stuff if you allow me. It must have been scary as hell, and none of us was there to help you. Please, let me help.” He wiped away the tears that started to roll down on Jaehyun’s cheeks. “I promise I won’t leave you ever again. You won’t have to be alone ever again. I swear.”

Jaehyun nodded frantically. Taeyong smiled at him and wrapped his arms around Jaehyun’s torso. “Let’s go and wash your face again, okay? You have your first broadcast today, I’m so proud of you.”

*

When Jaehyun reached home, he almost forgot about how he and Doyoung don’t talk. He felt too giddy, the radio show turned out to be better than he thought, and he got a lot of nice comments from the staff and the listeners. It wasn’t perfect, but he will get better – he promised himself this.

When he opened the door, he heard Doyoung’s voice – and another, a little less sharp one.

“… ld’ve told you this much.” The voice that Jaehyun recognized as Jeno’s said. Jaehyun peeked into the living room, where he saw Doyoung sitting on their couch, his laptop in front of him, and his younger brother’s judging face staring at him. “In fact, I told you this much. Hyung, you’ve known Jaehyun for years. Why do you suddenly act like he’s a stranger? You’re being a jerk again.”

“Jaehyun is _my_ omega, and you have nothing to do with our relationship,” Doyoung snapped. “So, stop sticking your nose where it doesn’t belong.”

Jeno scoffed. “You certainly didn’t behave like that. If you want to actually be Jaehyun hyung’s alpha, then-” the rising voice of Jeno got interrupted by a third voice.

“Jeno, you’re distressing Injun. Tone it down, love.” Jaehyun saw Jeno pout at someone above the camera, and he soon saw his own little brother entering the frame. Jaemin looked at Doyoung, and Jaehyun understood Renjun’s distress immediately. It seemed like not only Jeno but also Jaemin poured the alpha pheromones. “Doyoungie hyung,” Jaemin started in a rather strict tone. “You say he’s your omega. Then fucking act like it. If you don’t pull yourself together, I will seriously fuck you up. I won’t tolerate you hurting my brother any longer. Have a nice evening.”

The screen turned black, but Doyoung didn’t move. He seemed to be unaware of Jaehyun’s presence. Jaehyun decided to slowly back away, but the moment he took a step back, Doyoung moved to look at him. How long they held the eye contact without a word, Jaehyun didn’t know.

A little voice on the back of his mind told him that Doyoung never looked at him like this as if this was the first time he really _saw_ Jaehyun. But when Doyoung still just quietly stared at him, Jaehyun couldn’t take it anymore. He turned around and locked himself into his room.

**Act III**

The following morning found Jaehyun in the kitchen, leaning on the counter while having a stare-down with a cup of premade iced coffee from the Seven-Eleven down the block. The coffee itself didn’t cause much distress for Jaehyun, no. It was general coffee, from a fairly popular band, one you could get almost everywhere. What threw Jaehyun off of his game and his morning ritual was a bright pink post-it that was stick on its side.

Jaehyun couldn’t decide if the heart-shaped piece of paper was intentional or Doyoung just couldn’t find the square-shaped ones that they kept in the drawer of the writing desk.

And honestly, even the heart didn’t concern Jaehyun that much, although it gave him some food for thoughts. No, what was nearly unimaginable to him, especially after all that happened the previous day was what was written on the note, in his mate’s neat handwriting.

_Congratulations on your first broadcast!_

Doyoung wasn’t home when he woke up, he had an early lecture on Wednesdays, so he couldn’t ask about it, and he had already spent too much time trying to make sense of the situation, so in the end, he just grabbed the coffee and left for his class. He was clutching to the cup even after he drank the coffee, looking at it and pondering from time to time. He even brought it with himself to the studio.

“What’s up with the cup?” Johnny asked when they sat down in front of the microphones, some bubblegum k-pop song playing during the transition. “You clung to it the whole lesson in the morning, but you still haven’t finished it?”

Jaehyun felt his ears redden. “You will think it’s stupid.”

“Plausible. Out with it.”

Jaehyun let out a deep sigh at Johnny’s words. “I got it from Doyoung.”

Johnny blinked but didn’t say anything.

“Look, I _know_ it’s stupid, but he even wrote a post-it, see?” Jaehyun bit his lips. “What do you think it means?”

Johnny shrugged. “I think you should ask him.” He put on the headset. “But only _after_ the show.”

By the time Jaehyun reached home, however, Doyoung was already sleeping. Jaehyun scraped his bottom lips with his teeth a few times before deciding. He took off a pink heart-shaped post it from the fridge and stick it to the nightstand beside Doyoung’s bed.

_Thank you._

*

The following few days didn’t bring huge changes into Jaehyun’s life, but he was gradually feeling better, and it was greatly thanks to Johnny and Taeyong. He still didn’t see Doyoung a lot, but this time it was deliberate on his side. Still, Jaehyun noticed small changes in their lives in the apartment.

On Thursday, he noticed that the fridge was full for the first time since they moved in. What surprised him more than the concept of Doyoung doing housework while living with an omega, was the blocks of yogurt of Jaehyun’s favorite types on one of the shelves.

On Friday, he and Johnny went to Ikea, because Johnny needed a new bookshelf, and he deemed Jaehyun as the ideal shopping partner. Johnny paid for his lunch, so he didn’t mind much. What he forgot was that Sicheng was at Ikea as a part-time worker basically every time he wasn’t at the dance studio or at lectures, so he almost jumped on Johnny’s back when he spotted his ex-roommate. Of course, the commotion caught Sicheng’s attention, and he sent a small wave and a shy smile to Jaehyun. Later, as he headed to his Media and society class, he saw Ten, who flashed a tentative smile at him with Yuta, who blinked at him in confusion. Jaehyun supposed Taeyong informed them about what happened at the radio.

Saturday was the first day he finally found himself face to face to Doyoung. He didn’t have to be anywhere until the afternoon when Johnny promised him iced americano and to go through next week’s scripts, but he had a lot of time until he had to get ready for that, so he figured he could make something for lunch until then.

He cut up some pork belly and kimchi, and he set up the rice cooker. When he was slicing the onions, he noticed Doyoung lingering by the door, stealing glances at Jaehyun every now and then.

After Jaehyun poured the base sauce in the pot, making sure that it covers all the ingredients, he turned around to look at Doyoung. “Can I help you?” he asked with an eyebrow raised.

“I just…” Doyoung took a deep breath, “I wanted to apologize. I had no right to talk to you like that on Tuesday. It’s a no good excuse, but I guess I was so immersed in my own pain that I didn't notice yours. I blamed you for it, while it was only in my head. You're not a useless omega. Maybe you're not small and fragile, and maybe you're too stubborn and headstrong and independent, but you're not useless. You're far from it. And blaming you for having to move in with you wasn't fair either. It was my parents' idea. They have been telling me all my life that I will have to protect and provide, and they never really gave me a choice. And you're doing so well without me, I have really no idea how to approach this whole situation, you know? I guess I hated you for it because you're so different from what I've always been told what an omega is supposed to be like. But I will try to learn. I promise."

Jaehyun was stunned. He had no idea what the proper reaction to that would be, he was torn between sending Doyoung to somewhere warmer, what his hurt pride suggested, and giving in to his omega that wanted to nothing but cuddle his alpha and soothe his worries away. He took a deep breath and nodded. “Okay.”

“Okay?” Doyoung asked back and the hope in his voice stroke something deep in Jaehyun; the hope in his voice gave Jaehyun hope too. He just wished it wasn’t just foolish longing.

The way Doyoung helped him to lay the table and did the dished without being asked didn’t make things better.

*

He spent the Sunday with Taeyong, who kept his promise to help him with “the omega stuff.” He even brought Ten with him, who bear-hugged him the moment he saw Jaehyun and didn’t let go of him the whole time, clinging to him like a koala - despite Jaehyun assuring him he was willing to forgive the both of them.

On hindsight, he supposed it might have been because Taeyong calculated the course of Jaehyun’s omega cycle and held a really long lecture about what he needed to know about heats as an omega, and Ten wanted to make sure he doesn’t run away. Or pass out.

They even took Jaehyun shopping, Ten suggesting lewd lingerie and Taeyong throwing in more practical stuff as well. Jaehyun was a bit (a lot) afraid, but the couple swore that even if Doyoung didn’t help him, he wouldn’t necessarily need an alpha to get through his heat.

“Yongie and I are the living examples,” Ten smiled at him while contemplating between two butt plugs that Jaehyun certainly hoped weren’t for him. “If two omegas can mate then who needs alphas anyways?” he asked as he threw both toys in his basket.

“Ten is right,” Taeyong came up to them. “You will be fine, even if you’re going to be alone. But while it’s not necessary,” he held his mate’s hand with a big smile, “it is nice to have someone.”

After that day, Jaehyun felt antsy. Taeyong estimated his heat around Tuesday, which was way too close to Jaehyun’s liking, but he at least felt more prepared than before.

That didn’t mean the thought didn’t scare him.

Jaehyun also knew he needed to talk to Doyoung about his heat before it happened. It wasn’t as big of a deal as Jaehyun dreaded, Doyoung listened to him attentively but just nodded when Jaehyun told him what was to be expected.

He also told Johnny, who reassured him that he and Taeyong have covered it already.

So really, Jaehyun had no reason to be as anxious on Tuesday as he was.

Their Philosophy class got canceled, just like a sign from above, so Jaehyun didn’t bother to dress up too much – he just wore his old grey sweatpants that Doyoung despised so much with an old pink sweater that had ‘snooze’ written on its front with big letters. He didn’t want to just sit and wait until his heat started - he wanted something to distract him.

He decided cooking will do. As soon as he turned on the stove, he heard -and more importantly, he _smelled_ – Doyoung shuffle into the kitchen.

Doyoung looked tired, just like he did a month ago on _that_ night. The thought made Jaehyun’s stomach churn. He couldn’t stop himself. “You okay?”

He felt Doyoung’s eyes on him. He heard his mate humming before he asked: “What are you doing?”

“Pad Thai,” Jaehyun answered. “Johnny said there is a new pad Thai bar near the campus, he wants to check it out after my heat. I got a recipe from Ten, and I want to try it out before we go there. You know, to… to compare.”

Doyoung shifted closer. “You… you spend awfully much time with Johnny nowadays,” he said quietly.

The wooden spoon in Jaehyun’s hand stopped. “He’s a friend, hyung.”

Doyoung looked right back at him, so intently that Jaehyun shivered in it. “You haven’t called me hyung in a while.”

“We haven’t been talking in a while.” Jaehyun turned his attention back to the pan in front of him. “You don’t have to worry about Johnny. He’s really nice, and he’s a great friend but just that. A friend. You know my heart is yours, anyways.” Jaehyun turned to stove off, and he prepared a bowl for the noodles. He didn’t expect Doyoung to hug him from the back, holding him close like his life depended on it.

“Jaehyunie,” Doyoung rasped into his ear. “My Jaehyunie.” His breath reached the bite mark on Jaehyun’s neck, making Jaehyun’s legs weak, his omega restless. He felt the temperature rise and his heartbeat quicken, hints that his heat would break out soon.

“Hyung,” he whimpered. Doyoung gently guided Jaehyun to face him, so close that Jaehyun could feel his breath on his lips. Doyoung tilted his head and kissed Jaehyun sweetly, but Jaehyun sensed to impatience underneath. Soon everything seemed too hot.

“Let’s get to the bed,” Doyoung whispered against Jaehyun’s lips, and the younger didn’t find the strength in himself to say no to his mate.

*

He woke up with terrible soreness through his whole body. He knew heats were physically demanding for omegas, and now he had immense respect for every omega he ever met. Every muscle in his body protested against moving, even opening his eyes required too much energy.

But then a loud crash from the kitchen made him think otherwise. He forced his eyelids open and rolled over. Doyoung, who spent the past few days in the bed with him, helping him through his heat, now was nowhere to be seen. Jaehyun gathered all the strength he could and sat up, wrapping the sheets around him and went to see what happened.

Doyoung’s back faced the door as he was doing the dishes when Jaehyun peeked into their kitchen. Memories of being ignored and left bubbled up, and Jaehyun gulped. He had to try again. _Maybe this time_ …

“Hi.” He winced at his own voice, still hoarse from sleep and from the heat.

Doyoung spun around. “Hi,” he said. “Sorry did I wake you up?”

Jaehyun shook his head. Doyoung didn’t ignore him, that was a start. He watched as a tentative smile played on Doyoung’s lips.

“I made some omelet. I figured you would be hungry… I hope you’ll like it.”

Jaehyun opened his mouth only to close it seconds after. This took him by surprise. “I… thank you? I didn’t think… You didn’t have to… I mean…”

Doyoung beckoned him to sit down, and he put two plates down with forks and two mugs of coffee - he prepared one just as Jaehyun liked it, which dazzled Jaehyun yet again – he never thought Doyoung would know how he drinks his coffee.

When Doyoung sat down as well – to a beautifully set table, he even put flowers that Jaehyun had really zero ideas where he got them from – Jaehyun tried again.

“I didn’t think you would ever cook for me. Or cook for… well, anyone.”

“It’s just omelet, Jaehyun, not the world.” Doyoung stopped. “I know how to cook, I lived alone for a while. With Kun, but you know what I mean. Alphas have to eat too.”

Jaehyun smiled bitterly. “I meant that I am an omega now, and you seem to think that it’s the omega’s job to do things like this. So, I don’t see why you would do this. Especially for me.”

Doyoung sighed. “I wish I could say I don’t know where you’re coming from, but I guess it’s my fault after all, isn’t it?” He looked down, and after a few seconds of silence, he continued. “I wanted to do something nice for you. Jeno was right, I was a jerk. I talked to him and talked to Taeyong, and I even talked to Johnny, which was a rather eye-opening conversation. Anyways, I realized that… you were nothing but nice and supporting when it comes to me, but I was… well, an asshole to you. Not only since we’re mates, but before that too. And… being alpha doesn’t mean that I am above you, beta or omega. It means that I have the opportunity to protect and cherish my mate, and I did an awful job on that.” He looked back at Jaehyun. “Would you have dinner with me tonight? I want to take you out. We could go and meet up with the guys as well – Yuta is feeling really bad about throwing that slushie at you.”

Jaehyun laughed, but there was no happiness in it. “If he were feeling that bad, he would have apologized to me by now. He’s not the type to take back his words or his actions.” He regarded Doyoung for a moment. “But then again, neither are you.”

Doyoung smiled again at that. “How do you like the omelet, Jaehyunie?”

“No. Don’t. Don’t try to soften me by calling me Jaehyunie.” Jaehyun raised his mug to his mouth to get more time. He needed to be angry at Doyoung. He was failing miserably at it, by the way, Doyoung was doing exactly what Jaehyun has been secretly ever dreamt of: just the two of them, homemade meal and Doyoung paying attention to him.

But it wasn’t enough to make up for the past month Jaehyun was suffering through because of Doyoung. Jaehyun put his mug down.

“You’ve hurt me Doyoung. Deeply. A breakfast won’t make me forget that or make magically feel better. The only thing you’re doing at the moment is giving me hope that you will change, and we will have at least a slightly normal relationship.” Jaehyun finally felt enough strength in himself to look back at Doyoung. “So, if you plan on going back to friendship that’s…” Jaehyun gulped “that’s fine with me. Just please tell me if that’s what you want. Don’t give me hope.”

Doyoung looked at Jaehyun for a moment. _Really_ looked at him, as if he was staring at his very soul, and Jaehyun felt naked. Then Doyoung got up, got around the table and kneeled in front of Jaehyun, taking his face into his hands.

“I’d like to start over, Jaehyun. Just you and me, against the world...” he caressed Jaehyun’s cheeks, “like we used to.”

“So, I take it you don't hate me anymore?”

Doyoung shook his head. “I know I'm bad at this. I've always been bad at this. Can you give me one last chance? To prove that I can be an alpha you deserve.”

Jaehyun made a face. “It's not going to be easy, Doyoung.”

“I'm not in for easy anymore. I want you. Only you.”

_Only you_.

Jaehyun took a deep breath. Even after all of what happened, Jaehyun felt that Doyoung was the only one for him. He reached for Doyoung with shaky hands, pulling him closer. When he was close enough, Jaehyun leaned his head against Doyoung’s neck. And Doyoung immediately closed him in his arms.

And for the first time in what seemed forever, Jaehyun didn't feel like he was alone.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading this! Shout out to the prompter for the idea and to the enrara mods who dedicated time and work to this whole fic fest!
> 
> Also, this is officially my longest fic ever! Whew!  
> Tell me what you think!  
> (and love DoJae, poor babies deserve it)


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